This is wonderful

I can't tell you the exact date, I can tell you the exact moment, the exact feeling, the exact time and the exact day, but not the date. I am sure that someone else can tell me... I remember my head spinning and I remember trying to stay calm and focused. I remember Andrea praying and Nicki just taking them without any problems. I remember getting lost in Pontiac and that is what undid me. I remember Julia getting me back on track. I remember seeing him in the ER, getting ready for surgery and he is cracking jokes (he was on drugs).

I remember waiting and waiting in the surgery waiting room and I remember the surgery bouncing on his toes to talk to me. I remember that moment, because I knew that he was okay. I did not remember the surgeons name, but I remember him bouncing. He was excited because the breaks were really really bad and he got to put them together again.

It is nearly one year ago, when Steve crashed. One year has nearly passed and things have been really wonderful. I know that this must sound so crazy... because he is not employed, but things are wonderful.

He is walking. He is running, he is playing hockey. Yes, I said it, playing hockey. In his defense.. "I did not break my legs playing hockey." He loves it and he needs to be active, it is part of who is his, so he is playing hockey. And this is wonderful.

He has a hitch in his step, he is build differently now, and he has a lot of pain some days. But none of this slows him down. He is very active and very determined. He likes to have full days, and does not like to stop until the day is near the end. I like to think that he is doing this to prove that he can manage a full day of work on his feet the whole time and function. And he is. At night, some nights, it is difficult for him, the pain is great, but that is okay, because he is capable and stubborn and continues to use the princess ice packs to reduce the swelling in his knees. This is wonderful.

So if any of you out there are looking for a strong, determined, focused and stubborn worker, boy do I have one for you?! And goodness it would be wonderful if he were working again.

He does not like being out of work... me I love it. Of course the difference is that I know that I am going back to a job in the fall, and he wants to start a job now. I love sleeping till 8am, I love getting dressed some time before noon and I love decided what to do whenever... this is really wonderful.

The girls and I have been trying to entertain our selves with little money and it is fun. Sprinklers, bike rides and games. I feel the stress of the money, but they do not and to me that is (wait for it) wonderful.

I know that things will be okay, his unemployment benefits expire in September, so I am little nervous, but I know that things will be okay one day. He is alive, my children are happy and I sleep until 8am... so all in all, this is wonderful.